Mirrors-Into the heart

In my head, I’ll be damned, in my head i was walking around
Fighting with the lights off
I don’t know, I can see, I don’t wanna get that light into me
You feel it in the dark on your own

And now we dance, and now we dance,
And now we dance where the light drained our heaviest hearts
Come meet me in the dark
Off the mark, off the mark, off the mark we saw the place before all the lights went off
And now we’re in the dark
Oh come on honey, say what you want to
Oh come on honey, let’s just have a look into
Into the heart, into the heart, into the heart that wallows in the dark
Into the heart, into the heart, into the heart that wallows in the dark

In my head, I’ll be damned, in my head I’ll be making a stand
And when were dead we'll feel it
I don’t know, I can't see,
Why d'you wanna get that light into me?
You feel it in the dark on your own

Oh come on honey, say what you want to
Oh come on honey, let’s just have a look into
Into the heart, into the heart, into the heart that wallows in the dark
Into the heart, into the heart, that wallows in the dark
Let’s go back to the start, we’ve gone but not too far
Let’s go back to the start, we’ve gone but not too far
Let’s go back to the start, we’ve gone but not too far
Let’s go back to the start, we’ve gone but not too far

Into the heart, into the heart, into the heart that wallows in the dark
Into the heart, into the heart, into the heart that wallows in the dark
Into the heart, into the heart, into the heart that wallows in the dark
Into the heart, into the heart, into the heart that wallows in the dark

Gounod's Ave Maria

Ave maria
Gratia plena
Dominus tecum
Benedicta tu in mulieribus
Et benedictus fructos ventri tui jesus
Santa maria...
Santa maria...
Maria
Ora pro nobis
Nobis pecatoribus
Nunc et in ora,
In ora mortis nostrae
(santa maria, santa maria)
Maria
Ora pro nobis
Nobis pecatoribus
Nunc et in ora,
In ora mortis nostrae
Amen
Amen


Biography from wikipedia

Gounod was born in Paris, the son of a pianist mother and an artist father. His mother was his first piano teacher. Under her tutelage, Gounod first showed his musical talents. He entered the Paris Conservatoire, where he studied under Fromental Halévy and Pierre Zimmermann (he later married Zimmermann's daughter). In 1839, he won the Prix de Rome for his cantata Fernand. He was following his father; François-Louis Gounod (d. 1823) had won the second Prix de Rome in painting in 1783.
While in Italy, Gounod studied the music of Palestrina and other sacred works of the sixteenth century; these he never ceased to cherish. Around 1846-47 he gave serious consideration to joining the priesthood, but he changed his mind before actually taking holy orders, and went back to composition.
In 1854, Gounod completed a Messe Solennelle, also known as the Saint Cecilia Mass. This work was first performed, in its entirety, for the church of Saint Eustache in Paris on Saint Cecilia's Day, November 22, 1855; from this rendition dates Gounod's fame as a noteworthy composer.
During 1855 Gounod wrote two symphonies. His Symphony No. 1 in D major was the inspiration for the Symphony in C, composed later that year by Georges Bizet, who was then Gounod's 17-year-old student. In the CD era a few recordings of these pieces have emerged: by Michel Plasson conducting the Orchestre national du Capitole de Toulouse, and by Sir Neville Marriner with the Academy of St. Martin in the Fields.


Charles Gounod in 1859, the year of the premiere of Faust
Fanny Mendelssohn, sister of Felix Mendelssohn, introduced the keyboard music of Johann Sebastian Bach to Gounod, who came to revere Bach. For him, The Well-Tempered Clavier was "the law to pianoforte study...the unquestioned textbook of musical composition". It inspired Gounod to devise an improvisation of a melody over the C major Prelude (BWV 846) from the collection's first book. To this melody, in 1859 (after the deaths of both Mendelssohn siblings), Gounod fitted the words of the Ave Maria, resulting in a setting that became world-famous.
Gounod wrote his first opera, Sapho, in 1851, at the urging of a friend of his, the singer Pauline Viardot; it was a commercial failure. He had no great theatrical success until Faust (1859), derived from Goethe. This remains the composition for which he is best known; and although it took a while to achieve popularity, it became one of the most frequently staged operas of all time, with no fewer than 2,000 performances of the work having taken place by 1975 at the Paris Opéra alone, not counting other theatres. The romantic and melodious Roméo et Juliette (based on the Shakespeare play Romeo and Juliet), premiered in 1867, is revived now and then but has never come close to matching Faust's popular following. Mireille, first performed in 1864, has been admired by connoisseurs rather than by the general public. The other Gounod operas have fallen into oblivion.


Caricature from Punch, 1882
From 1870 to 1874 Gounod lived in England, becoming the first conductor of what is now the Royal Choral Society. Much of his music from this time is vocal. He became entangled with the amateur English singer Georgina Weldon, a relationship (platonic, it seems) which ended in great acrimony and embittered litigation.Gounod had lodged with Weldon and her husband in London's Tavistock House.
Later in his life, Gounod returned to his early religious impulses, writing much sacred music. His Pontifical Anthem (Marche Pontificale, 1869) eventually (1949) became the official national anthem of Vatican City. He expressed a desire to compose his Messe à la mémoire de Jeanne d'Arc (1887) while kneeling on the stone on which Joan of Arc knelt at the coronation of Charles VII of France. A devout Catholic, he had on his piano a music-rack in which was carved an image of the face of Jesus.
He was made a Grand Officer of the Légion d'honneur in July 1888. In 1893, shortly after he had put the finishing touches to a requiem written for his grandson, he died of a stroke in Saint-Cloud, France.
One of Gounod's short pieces for piano, "Funeral March of a Marionette", received a new and unexpected lease of life from 1955 when it was first used as the theme for the television series Alfred Hitchcock Presents. His secular piano-accompanied songs were numerous and much praised by Ravel, but are seldom heard in recitals today.

Nancy Sinatra- Bang Bang(My baby shot me down)

I was five and he was six
we rode on horses made of sticks
he wore black and i wore white
he would always win the fight
bang, bang
he shot me down
bang, bang
i hit the ground
bang, bang
that awful sound, bang bang, my baby shot me down.
seasons came and changed the time, when i grew up i called him mine
he would always laugh and say remember when
we used to play bang bang i shot you down bang
bang you hit the ground bang bang that awful sound
bang bang i used to shoot you down
music played and people sang
just for me the church bells rang
now he's gone i don't know why
and to this day sometimes i cry
he didn't even say goodbye he didn't take the time to lie
bang, bang
he shot me down, bang bang
i hit the ground
bang, bang that awful sound, bang bang
my baby shot me down.

The Great Frog

World Famous Rock Jewellery

10 Ganton Street,
London W1F 7QR
http://www.thegreatfroglondon.com/

The Kooples & The Great Frog
By Jon Savage
I once the preserve of black-clad outsiders, nowit has been reconfigured - in the collaboration between the Kooples and theGreat Frog - as a sleek high fashion item.
n the 21st century, thelifestyle and appearance of the formerly marginal, outcast even, have becomechic
and desirable. Take theexample of the skull ring:
This Skull Head is abeautiful object. Hand-carved in wax at the Soho studios of the Great Frog, itis then cast in UK hallmarked sterling silver. It has an enigmatic lustre thatmomentarily diverts the mind from what it is: a skull-head, that memento moribeloved of pirates, rockers, and all those who choose to live outside the law.
The Great Frog have beenproducing the Skull Head since 1972, and over the last four decades, they hadmany celebrity clients. They include outsiders like Lemmy, Iggy Pop, AliceCooper and Pete Doherty. But their appeal is wider, extending to modern heroeslike the Arctic Monkeys, Pink and - the biggest pop star on the planet - LadyGaga.
The collaboration with thesharp style of the Kooples is not as surprising as it might seem. Severalgenerations of Parisians in particular have had a deep and well researchedfascination with the style and music of hardcore rock and have been among theGreat Frog's best customers.
For this project, theSkull was subtly redesigned by Reino Lehtonen Riley, the son of the Great Frogfounder Paterson Riley. There are subtle changes to the basic skull template:the eye sockets are slightly narrowed, and the teeth are neatly arranged. Theforehead is domed, and there is no excess decoration.
The result is a sleek,minimal artefact that fits the Kooples brief of classics with a twist. It canbe worn as a flourish to an otherwise conventional looking outfit: an index ofa wildness that chooses not to proclaim itself, but rather to be discovered bythose with eyes to see.
This new variant on theDeath's Head shows that it is possible to give familiar symbols new relevance.Over the last sixty years the skull ring has made a long move from outré rockerto high fashion: the process begun by rock- stars and cutting-edge designers isfinally complete. What remains is the power of the image.
What is it that we findso attractive about pirates and rock stars, those iconic wearers of the SkullHead? It's not that they are death-haunted, but that every time they look atthat symbol, they recog-nise the finite quality of life. So it serves as apermanent reminder to extract the maximum intensity from the moment, to be herenow. It's the only way to live

Easter Day

Today, I pray that the stone in somewhere is spinning forever for proving that I still...
And What if god exists,the sunlight like today's one let my future shine and...

This season is the most beautiful one in London
@Regent Park

Royal Opera House

The most dramatic moment in my life is waiting behind the curtain.

Tsar's Bride
23th April 2011

Burberry Beijing 2011

My brand new playlist

1.Glasvegas Europhoric
2.Gold panda Lucky Shiner
3.The crookses Chasing after ghosts
4.Craft spells Idle Labor
5.The pains of being pure at Heart Belong
6.Noze Dring
7.Naked&Famous Passive me,Agressive you
8.Mirrors Lights and Offerings
9.Singing Adams Everybody friends now
10.The oscillation Veil
11.Peaking Lights 936
12.Pj Harvey Let England Shake

Rough Trade Records

My music paradise.
The recommended musics are catching my ear.
I've never found out this sort of the source like here which exactly informs me of rare but so sophisticated and real music not not manufactured by the system.
Amazingly, the staffs of the records shop are very knowledgable about indie genre.
I can't help being sticking with juke box. I felt just I meet new world to stimulating my ear.

Finally, I got a wonderful route;behave>keep zero gravity>rough trade record>cafe1001>the lights


66 Golborne Road,London,W10 5PS
http://www.roughtraderecords.com/

1-100

designed by graham tabor+miguel villalobos

more info: http://one-onehundred.com/

TL-180

Vintage style but very timeless design and bit witty.
leather is also nice.
the brand is displayed in 'workshop'
more info: http://www.tl-180.com/

custom design_jean jacket

shoulder part with knitted orange colored mesh.

Metronomy - The Look (live janvier 2011)

Fleet ilya

http://www.fleetilya.com/
Unit 8, Maun House, 1 Dunn Street, London, E8 2DG

siki im

Metronomy-The Look

You're up and you'll get down
You never running from this town
Kinda think you said
You'll never get anything better than this
'Cause you're going round in circle
And everyone knows you're trouble
Cause you read it in a big book
And now you giving me the look look
But just remember how we shook shook
And all the things we took took
This times the oldest friend of mine


Get up and we get down
We're always running round this town
And to think I said
We'd never make anything better than this
'Cause we're always in small circles
And everyone thinks we're trouble
We didn't read it in the big book
And now we're giving you the look look
Just remember how we shook shook
And all the things we took took
This times the oldest friend of mine

Asher Levine: shoes collection

http://www.asherlevine.com/

L'amour fou

이제 한국도 드디어 개봉했구나.

Lindstrøm & Christabelle - Lovesick

Are you gonna be there?
Are u sure u gonna call back
When i’m calling up another?
Did you know that I’m sick?
Did u think i will quit?
Did u think i’ll go home?

Cant u hear im sick? I'm love sick
Can’t you hear this phone
Like my heart is quick

I'm love sick, can’t you hear this phone
All down, can we make it up

Can you call it a sound
Can u move to the beat?
Can you listen to the beat?
Can you feel my beat?
Can you feel the base?
Can you hear the ......
can you makin its up
Cause I want to be happy

Can't u hear I'm sick?
I'm love sick
Can’t you hear this phone
Like my heart is quick
I'm love sick, cant u hear im sick?
Can’t you hear this phone?
All down, all down

you don't know babe
you don't know babe
You don't know babe
You don’t know anything

Are you gonna be there?
Are u sure u gonna call back
When i’m calling up another?
Cant you hear im sick? anekatips I'm love sick
Can’t you hear this phone
Like my heart is quick
I'm love sick, can’t you hear this phone
All down, can we make it up

Cant you hear im sick? I'm love sick
Can’t you hear this phone
Like my heart is quick
I'm love sick, can’t you hear this phone
All down, can we make it up

APHRODITE LES FOLIES 2011 TOUR

Finally, I see her!! It's so dramatic and unrealistic.
She was singing less 10m far from me.
She is very clever cuz she's employed amazing choreographer who makes theatrical movement for overcoming that her short and slim body can't make dramatic impact alone. she's gently danced like gesture, but muscled and perfect body-fit dancers let her motion highlight and boost by doing dance which seems like almost modern ballet.
I think the reason that she keeps her career until now is her charming voice..sometimes like humming.
She knows how to maximise her vocal color to be appealing to people..someone criticises her woe-begone sighs.
Yes, her songs could be said that it is soooo cheesy.
But why do people eat candy even they know it's just sugar and nothing else?
Because It's pleasure..lick and roll it in your mouth and taste sweeties slowly,deeply. It's all about something that.
the image of Kylie is all about fantasy of that.So I've love her since I was 14years old and I admire her tactic and really enjoy it. Should I be shame on that or feel guilty?
No!

12th April
In the o2 arena London

Whisky tours of Scotland

Whisky has been produced in Scotland for centuries. The Gaelic "usquebaugh", meaning "Water of Life", phonetically became "usky" and then "whisky" in English.
it is diluted from 4 regions;Highland, lowland, speyside, isaly. The taste is different by where it has been produced.

Speyside
The Speyside, or Strathspey, region of northeastern Scotland is the center of the country’s distillery business. At the time of writing, 46 distilleries are currently putting out whiskies in Speyside, more than any other region in the country and nearly as many as the other three regions combined. Speyside Scotches include some of the most popular brands, especially overseas, including Glenfiddich, The Glenlivet, The Macallan, and Balvenie. Speysides have a tendency to be sweet, rather than particularly peaty, and are thought to be some of Scotland’s most aromatic brands.
Highlands and Islands
Though geographically speaking, the Speyside region is part of the Scottish Highlands, the Highland whiskies from outside of Speyside are a whole different animal. This is by far the largest region and so it isn’t surprising that there is a lot of variety within the Highland Scotches. The western Highland whiskies, represented by brands like Oban, Talisker and Ben Nevis, tend to be dry with a spicy or peppery taste. The northern Highland malts like Glenmorangie and 2009 World Whiskey Award winner Highland Park are slightly salty with more floral notes in their flavor. The central Highlands, home to Dalwhinnie among others, tends to produce sweet whiskies with a very strong aroma. On the eastern side of the region, the whiskies are smokier, and some can have a bit of fruity taste.
Lowlands
The lowlands of Scotland tend to produce a milder class of whisky, which have always been popular south of the border in England. As opposed to using malt, as most distilleries do, some lowland brands are grain whiskies, using not only barley but also corn and wheat in their process. Glenkinchie is a great example of a lowland Scotch. If you are looking to introduce someone to their first Scotch whisky, a relatively mild lowland brand might be the best choice.
Islay
Islay is the southernmost of the Inner Hebrides, and though it is home to only eight distilleries, they are considered so unique from the rest of the Scotches to warrant being thought of as an entirely different region. Islay Scotches often include peat, leading to a deep, earthy flavor. They can sometimes be salty, similar to the northern Highland malts. Two great examples of Islay whiskies are two of the most celebrated brands of the last decade, Ardbeg and Laphroaig.

my favorite is the one made from Islay which tastes smoky and dry.
If you can't find any good one, just order Glenfiddich,The Macallan from the speyside. both are very popular.

9th april 2011
in Edinburgh

The cult of beauty: art for art's sake

I don't agree on that art must be evaluated by ethics or social custom.
Art should surpass common sense and explore undiscovered field.
Art like writing poem, drawing painting,composing music notes and tailoring clothing always comes from unattainable desire.
desire is crave and longing which is restricted by society and unspoken.
So, Art could be pure when it pursue for being art and only beauty.
Look at peacock or read "salome" written by Oscar wild.

6th April 2011
in V&A


article from: Independent

The Cult of Beauty: Beautiful Dreamers
A new exhibition at the V&A showcases the work of the 19th-century Aesthetic Movement. Arifa Akbar explores the enduring allure of art for art's sake


Until the summer of 1877, a small circle of artists volubly rejected the "ugliness" of the Victorian age in favour of a purer appreciation of aesthetics. They had been dismissed as velvet-clad bohemians and dissolute dandies who congregated in prettified corners of west London to cock a snook at convention and exhibit artworks in their own homes for lack of patronage.

The group of renegades – Frederic Leighton, William Morris, James McNeill Whistler, G F Watts, Edward Burne-Jones, Dante Gabriel Rossetti – had been coming together since the 1860s but it was their momentous 1877 exhibition, staged at the fashionable Grosvenor Gallery in the heart of Bond Street, that tipped them from the obscurity of their Holland Park salons into the big time.

The show sent excited ripples across high society – the kind of "art buzz" that over a century later would hit the Royal Academy with Charles Saatchi's 1997 Sensation exhibition – and so these aesthetes became the Young British Artists of their day whose Aesthetic Movement was proselytized in Europe and America in decades to come.

An exhibition, opening on Saturday at the Victoria & Albert Museum in London, will unite the art, craft, jewellery and inspirations of the Aesthetics in its fullness, and reveal the extent to which their maverick philosophy, with its focus on the primacy of beauty in a work of art over and above a moral message, became a guiding principle of the 20th century.

Some key works will be united at the V&A for the first time since leaving the Grosvenor, including two "star works" of the original show by Burne-Jones and Watts, and the gallery space will partly be re-created.

In 1877, the gallery's guests were mesmerised by the paintings and their subject matter, so utterly removed from the social realities of the day, and hinting at an otherworldly landscapes of Grecian idylls and ivory towers.

The models in these works did not display the genteel good looks familiar to Victorian portraiture but were unconventional red-heads dressed like nymphs in diaphanous robes, a look that the phalanx of wealthy women at the Grosvenor immediately sought to emulate while their wealthy male counterparts became avid buyers and patrons.

The Aesthetic's abiding dictum was to create "art for art's sake", a Gallic term (l'art pour l'art) that they adopted as their own that summed up the new ideal of a beauty removed from any social reality or overarching religious morality.

Their commitment to beauty was not limited to the canvas; the aesthetic philosophy was an ostentatious one that extended fully into their lives. The cultivation of a beautiful living space was essential to their purpose, they claimed, with no hint of irony. They dressed flamboyantly, used the peacock feather as their motif, lived in homes they called "palaces of art" and followed the spirit of John Ruskin's Aesthetic sentiment: "Beautiful art can only be produced by people who have beautiful things around them."

Stephen Calloway, curator of the V&A show, says the idea of a larger sense of beauty that is disconnected from a moral register and is all pervasive is one that endures today in our preoccupations with design and interior decor. Morris and Leighton were, in this sense, the high-minded prototypes to our modern-day Laurence Llewelyn-Bowens and Gok Wans. "People had art on their wall but this group lived their life based on the principle that everything should be beautiful. It is an idea that we take for granted now. Everything became a creative endeavour – how you lived your life, how you decorated your home," says Calloway.

While the concept of an art that existed just to be beautiful might appear whimsical or elitist today, at the time the separation of aesthetics from moral propriety was regarded as radical and dangerous, and this separation came to dominate 20th-century art as a fundamental principle.

"You can say that their endeavour was all about creating a rarefied atmosphere. On the other hand, they wanted their way of life to be artistic and they said people should have high aspirations. William Morris was an early socialist and his idea of beauty was that it should not be for the few but for all," adds Calloway.

Another distinguishing feature of the group was their ability to manipulate and market their own image – the way they looked, the way they lived their lives, and romances they had and the homes they lived in became a matter of immense public fascination, and deliberately so. The clique knew exactly how to build their personas and manage their images – a feature that reflects a very contemporary, PR-savvy sensibility.

"Artists now think they are special but this is an idea that was very much underlined by the arrival of the Aesthetics' attitude. They were aware of their bohemian legend. Several of the artists created extraordinary houses. It was part of the way they presented themselves."

The artists took their leads from the wild coterie of Romantic poets such as Byron, Shelley, Keats, although they did not live nearly as hard or die as young. Burne-Jones, Morris and Leighton were working prolifically into old age.

And as captivating as this cult of personality proved to be, their peacock feathers and long-haired loftiness also left them open to ridicule, together with stories of decadence and complicated amours. As the years went by, they were attacked for being a narcissistic, pavonine and self-regarding group that was prone to excessive foppery.

Satirical ribaldry against them emerged in the form of cartoons in Punch and in Gilbert and Sullivan's opera Patience. Calloway says this cloud of disparaging humour did "slightly puncture the grandeur of the movement". A young Oscar Wilde, still a student at Oxford at the time, came on board the movement to counteract the negative publicity after being asked by the theatre impresario, D'Oyly Carte, who was promoting Gilbert and Sullivan's opera, to undertake a series of lectures in America so the nation would understand the opera's many contemptuous references to the movement. Wilde spent a year lecturing, giving 300 talks and travelling a thousand miles to spread the word. His efforts paid off: aestheticism became well understood in America.

Yet for all its success, Aestheticism was, in some senses, destroyed by the same fin de siècle scandal and controversy on which it had first risen to fame decades earlier. Wilde's trial and imprisonment for homosexuality came to epitomise the apparent decadence of the group, although by that time, he had turned his hand to playwriting and moved away from the ideals of the group.

Ironically, their work was also beginning to be mass produced by manufacturers who saw a business opportunity in the selling of beautiful homes: art for art's sake became synonymous with interior decor, furniture and the beginnings of an art that overlapped with design – furnishings were produced for ordinary homes in the suburbs, not extraordinary ones in Holland Park, and entrepreneurial Victorian manufacturers started to call what they were making "art decoration" or "art furniture". Everyone, it seemed, could become an "artist" for the price of wallpaper.

The movement, some have suggested, became what it sought to get away from: a symbol of industry and commerce. As a response to this, as well as the unrelenting satires that had built up around the movement, a second wave of Aesthetics emerged around 1890, far edgier and more decadent than their founding figures, who sought to distance themselves from the original movement that had been so dragged down, and who brought an end to this particularly fascinating chapter of art history.

workshop

Workshop/Harris wharf style
based on Italy and london

smart,clean cutting tailored jacket, coat and daily dress
special fabric.(two folded jersey,unique knitted fabric)
flexible and perfect fitting. even non-seamless.

19 camden passage N1 8EA
www.workshop-london.co.uk

Jamie Woon - Night Air

Night air has the strangest flavor
Space to breathe it, time to savor
All that night air has to lend me
Till the morning makes me angry
In the night air
In the night air
In the night air
In the night air

I’ve acquired a kind of madness
Daylight fills my heart with sadness
And only silent skies can sooth me
Feel that night air flowing through me
In the night air
In the night air
In the night air
In the night air


I don’t need those car crash colors
I control the skies above us
Close my eyes to make the night fall
Comfort of the world revolving
I can hear the earth in orbit
In the night air
In the night air
In the night air
In the night air

I’ve acquired a taste for silence
Darkness fills my heart with comfort
And each thought like a thief is driven
To steal the night air from the heavens
In the night air (x14)

Brick Lane

The Skin Tights at Brick Lane from Idle Eyes on Vimeo.

From http://mrnewton.net/category/london-day/

I'm happy that I can visit brick Lane whenever I want

seven one eight

seven one eight

Take me New York
or let me settle down anywhere.

An interview with Alan J. Flusser

Olympia Diving Sequence

A section from Leni Riefenstahl's film of the 1936 Olympics

blue print

terminal and cocktail

Fashion essay-6: scarf

아, 순간이여. 이대로 멈추어라. 그만.

봄이 왔다. 런던의 겨울은 살갗을 에리는 바람 때문에 보내기 힘들기보다 지난하게 추적거리며 내리는 비와 야속하게 빨리 찾아오는 어둠때문에 마음이 적막해져서 괴롭다. 겨우내 늘 해를 가린 먹구름에 축축해진 마음을 널어둘 곳이 없어 봄을 그렇게 애타게 기다렸나보다. 요즘 나만 당연시 오는 봄의 방문을 채근한 것이 아니였음을 거리를 걷다보면 느낀다. 주말에 소호나 노팅힐을 걷다보면 까페 문밖 의자들은 어김없이 누군가의 차지다. 모두들 아나보다. 햇살내리쬐는 날 거리에 앉아 커피를 마시며 거리소음과 화음을 이루며 들리는 상대의 목소리가 이상하게 정답고 한결 가볍고, 화사해진 사람들의 옷차림이 주는 감동과 이웃레스토랑의 빵내음에 마음이 포근해지는 것을 말이다. 그런데 이런 내 마음보다 일찍 봄이 찾아온 곳이 있는데 그 곳은 아무래도 쇼윈도우가 아닌가 싶다.
고백하건데, 나는 정말이지 올봄의 도래가 조금은 두려웠다. 2011년 봄여름 컬렉션은 말 그대로 오색찬란형형색색이었다. 이 시각적 충격이란. 심지어 핑크색과 라이트블루의 깔맞춤 수트라니 이거는 납득이 안되었다. 물론 결단컨데 나는 트렌드세터도 아니요 패션니스타 추종자도 아니다.하지만 블랙과 소위 엣지한 라인을 신봉하는 나로써는 이 모든 것들이 경거망동하게 느껴졌다.
그런데 말이다. 정작 봄이 오니 마음이 동하더란 말이다. 나는 마네킹이 걸친 핑크색 스커트가 벚꽃만큼이나 화려한 청순미가 있고 옐로우 탑을 보고는 레몬에이드만큼이나 상큼달짝하면서 톡 쏘는 맛을 느꼈고 살짝 걸친 블루 가디건에서 맑게 개인 하늘을 보면서 느꼈을 법직한 청량함을 맛봤다. 그래서 결국 과감한 에스닉 패턴에 깃털을 덧댄 데님 자켓을 사버렸다. 그리고 여기에 블루프레임의 선글라스를 끼면 정말이지 내가 비로소 봄의 방문에 부응을 하고 있다는 착각마저 들 정도이다. 하지만 늘 식상하게 이 데님자켓을 입고 싱그러운 미스터 스프링을 맞을 수는 없는 노릇이다. 가장 수고롭지 않은 방법은 아무래도 무심하게 그리고 아리따웁게 봄바람에 살랑일 수 있는 스카프를 목에 슥 두르는 것일테다.
개인적으로 스카프만큼이나 봄다운 아이템이 있을까 싶다. 꽃내음과 함께 불어오는 바람에 살포시 나부끼는 그 유려한 흐름과 쏟아지는 햇빛에 투과되어 보이는 색상은, 봄이 몰고온 심리적 파동과 시각적 유흥을 그대로 담아낸다. 펄럭이는 스카프는 세상의 중력을 거부하는 듯 싶고 수평으로 흐르는 움직임은 미묘하게 어지럼증을 불러일킨다. 이것이야말로 봄바람 난 처녀의 그 심적 파동과 무엇이 다르겠는가. 이 나른함, 이 알랑이며 콧끝을 스치고 지나가는 야릇함말이다. 그리고 눈을 감아본다. 먼 곳으로부터 오는 선적의 돛대와 향수를 가득담은 깃발과 이제는 만날 수 없는 여인의 긴 머리카락같은 것을 말이다. 다시 불어오는 바람에 숨을 들이쉬어 본다. 미세한 터치의 쟈스민,라일락 그리고 체리블로섬이 알싸하게 콧끝을 훔치고 내달린다. 곧 흠칫 눈을 뜬다.
불현듯 옛날에 엄마로부터 들은 기묘한 이야기가 생각난다. 아주 아름다운 무용수가, 달리는 자동차 바퀴에 그녀가 두른 스카프가 말려서 그만 그녀가 질식사로 죽었다는 이야기가 말이다. 처음에 이 이야기를 들었을 때 비극적이라는 느낌보다 비현실적이고 우습다라는 생각이 먼저 찾아왔다. 대게 죽음은 장엄하고 엄숙하여서 살아남은 자들을 숙연하게 만들지 않은가. 오픈카를 타고 젠체하게 스카프를 맺는데 질식사라니 이거는 너무나 초현실적이다. 나는 이상하게 그녀의 허세가 초래한 드라마틱한 실수같았다. 13살 봄, 미술수업 중에 나는 너무나 이 이야기 속 ‘그녀’와 다른 이사도라 던컨 Isadora Duncan을 만났다. 그녀의 춤사위는 그녀를 죽음으로 몰고간 스카프만큼이나 미려하고 우아하고 가벼웠다. 무엇보다 자유로웠다. 그녀는, 발레리나의 육체를 옭아맨 토슈즈와 뛰뛰를 버리고 맨발로 그리스 여인의 토가 드레스를 연상시키는 옷을 입고 춤을 추었다. 너무나 ‘신화’적 mythological이었다. 파격적이면서 클래식했다. 동시에 그 기이한 사인이 동시에 ‘신화’ myth같았다. 무게감조차 느껴지지 않는 새털같은 죽음이어서 실소조차 나왔는데 무용역사의 남긴 그녀의 발자국은 반대로 너무나 선명 했고 무게감은 엄중했다. 그녀의 기이한 사인을 13살의 나는 친구들에게 가십처럼 이야기했다. 27살(만 25살이다..25살이다!)의 나는 그녀의 죽음을 그때와는 다르게 바라본다. 물론 나에게 닥치면 이성과는 무관한 감정의 격한 동요를 느끼겠지만 분명 죽음은 삶으로부터 멀리 떨어진 곳에 존재하지 않는다는 것을 공감한다. 봄처럼 그렇게 훅하고 와서 봄날의 그 정취를 휙하고 앗아가듯 가버릴터이고 바람에 풀려버린 스카프만큼이나 그렇게 속절없이 내 발걸음과는 무관하게 내달려버릴테임을 안다. 그런데 말이다. 나는 아직은 그런 모든 것들이 두렵고 애닳고 회피하고만 싶다. 그 일시성, 가망없음 그리고 찰나의 순간성같은 것들이 나를 괴롭힌다. 그래서 늘 영원을 꿈꾸고 완전성을 추구하고 착각같은 완벽한 발현을 염원하는 것일지도 모른다. 이상하게 나는 스카프가 바람에 날리는 것을 보면 눈물이 날 거 같다. 그렇지만 운 적은 없다.